Random generator

My son has an app on his iPod touch called the random number generator. You give it some parameters and it spits out numbers randomly. My brain is exactly the same except they are thoughts rather than numbers and minus the parameters.

Which is how I came to wonder: why even have an invisible jet?  I mean, Wonder Woman isn’t invisible so now she just looks stupid sitting in midair with her hands out in front of her. The bad guys can still see her right? So this seems like a silly mode of transportation.

Another random thought. The cover of Glamour magazine had a headline that read: “29 Things He’s Thinking When You’re Naked.” Really? Twenty-nine? I can think of three:

  • Uhhh . . . (This may or may not be accompanied by drool)
  • Woo Hoo!


  • Please, please, please keep the heels on.

But 29 thoughts? That’s a lot of thinking.
and for the ladies I thought of two:

  • Woo Hoo!


  • Did I remember to unplug my curling iron?

Again, Twenty nine? And why 29, not a nice round 30. Like if it is 29 then the author really must’ve interviewed guys because if it was just some writer at their desk making shit up then they would’ve done a round number. So if it is 29 then these are REAL things thought by guys and this writer just only knows 29 guys to interview or something.

So anyway, my randomly generating brain goes on like this while I’m trying to run errands then somewhere along the line I remember I’m supposed to be doing something.  So the next thought is: ‘What was I doing?’,  followed by: ‘Oh yeah, going to Target because I need toilet paper.’

Then the brain generates another random thought.  What did they do before toilet paper?

3 thoughts on “Random generator

  1. This is why I love you. You makes me feel less crazy!! My boyfriend is constantly doing one of two things… 1) looking over at me and saying “Your hamster wheel is going again” or 2) Laughing at me and telling me “You think way too much about things”. Where did the saying “Have you cake and eat it too.” come from?? If I have cake what else am I going to do but eat it?? Sometimes I have one normal thought that turns into an another, then another, until its this crazy chain and I can’t even remember how I got from “How should I get my hair cut?” to “I wonder if I can get the recipe for Panera’s mac and cheese?”

  2. Around naked women, I am pretty sure there is only one thought in my head.

    I say “pretty sure” because that thought is so overpowering that it shuts down any any access to long term storage, meaning I can’t 100% accurately recall what I thought after the fact.

  3. So being inside a woman’s mind is like going on a magical mystery tour? I thought that’s what air miles are for? The writer of that Glamour article must have been a woman. 29 thoughts while alone with a naked woman!? Not in a man’s “hunter-minded” capacity when there’s naked flesh within his grasp. Well I suppose there could be extenuating circumstances that would give rise to…wonder woman in her “see through” air miles vehicle.

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